Trudging slowly with the help of a curved, delicate cane which might break anytime, she put in great effort
to carry her body with her powerless legs. A pungent odour of medicine wafted into her nose and she covered it
with much disgust. She continued her way to the counter.
She was made very uncomfortable by the unkind and peculiar looks from people waiting beside her. It was
as if she was an immoral, guilty criminal who perpetrated a serious crime waiting for the sentence to be
delivered by the judge.
She kept her head down, found a seat and sat down. A child beside her instantly stood up and looked at his
dad.
‘
Dad she is so smelly! And look at her clothes? Is she a beggar?’ The child yelled, pointing a finger at her.
‘
Change seat then,’ his dad said stonily.
People around her gradually took the father and son as a cue and took up seats further from her. A few
would rather stand. Merciless, mocking words drilled into her ears, disregarding her reluctance. Her head was
kept down to make sure nobody could see her emaciated face, though knowing nobody would want to, until the
nurse called her into the room for the last time.
The last few words had an unconscionably heavy weight on her heart. She was left wordless for a few
seconds. She was looking for words to react and ended up questioning the authenticity of what the doctor told
her repeatedly over ten times.
Finding her incredulous manner so wearisome, the doctor gave her the last warning, saying that if she
insisted on asking the same stupid question again, she would call the security and drag her out of the hospital.
‘
Now leave immediately, I have other patients waiting for me outside.’
‘
Please, doctor, tell me it is not true. I…’
‘
Call the security now! Take this woman out!’
‘
No, doctor, no please! Please do the test for me again, you may have made a mistake! Please doctor, I beg
you…’
‘
I am sorry for you Mrs. Ho but it is an undeniable fact. You can blame nobody but yourself. Blame
yourself, Mrs. Ho. Everyone with a common sense about hygiene knows that it is highly risky and unwise to
engage in blood-selling, especially at those stations in this town where those guys have no regard for people’s
health.’
‘
Doctor please, I beg you! I will give you extra money for another test…’
‘
Come on it has nothing to do with money. On top of that what you lack most is money. Just go home. The
technology we have currently is incapable of producing remedies for AIDS. Anyway, Ah Keung, please take
this woman out and do not let her in.’
She was on her own.
The road had never seemed such long and hard, in spite of the innumerable footprints left by herself on it.
Her walking pace slowed down. The footsteps got heavier.
Then it caught her eyes. She should be very acquainted with it. But she would like to see it again. She never
had the time and mood to feast her eyes on it. She never rolled her eyes over every small detail of it.
Surprisingly she found it particularly splendid under the gentle, golden sunlight which thrilled through rosy
clouds. A gratified smile was hung on her face.
She was supposed to know exactly what scene would come up in front of her eyes in the next moment. But
now everything in front seemed so odd. She could not recognise anything. Every grass. Every tree. Even the sky.
She started to think that the road was leading to her to somewhere unknown. She was frightened by the
thought that she could not reach the destination. She dreaded never seeing her children again. She worried about
her son’s health. She was anxious about her daughter not being able to make a living. The picture of her son and
daughter living forlornly without anybody looking after them was conjured up in her messy mind, giving her
heart an invisible stab.
Staring at her small silhouette eventually mixing with the surrounding shadows to form a complete darkness
discouraged her from going on. Now nothing left. No light. All darkness.
She stopped finally and fell down hard onto her knees. The cane dropped. Her knees were bleeding on the
rugged road, but the pain did not matter now. Then she let out a long, deep sigh, fraught with grief and
mourning.
She looked up and saw the Great Wall. She cried.
Long before he had come, she had been kneeling there for long. Her legs were totally numb now. Her eyes
were glued to the few faint words engraved on the stone. That few words were the reason for the teardrops on
the stone. She was convulsed with unceasing sobs.