can never stop to look at the ones who came from the past. At the moment he wants to close his eyes, a young
man comes and sits down. The old man feels the vibration as the man sits on the wooden bench. The young man
seems to be attracted by the old man’s worn notebook. The curious man says, “Can I take a look?”. The old man
is a bit shocked, then grins with his toothless mouth, and says, “Sure.”. He then hands it to the young man. He
seems interested in this kind of ancient thing. His eyes are filled up with excitement and curiosity, as he flips
through page after page. He says, “Could you tell me more about this?”. The old man then nods, as he is
desperate to share with anyone who wants to know more about his story…
“
I was born in 1920 when wars were constantly expected to happen. The intensive confrontation between
Communism and Capitalism was pretty active around that period. The interior war of China was another fatal
harm to the Chinese. Yet, just then, the fight between China and other countries wasn’t expected to have an end.
As everyone then, was trying so hard to show their power. The constant wars were seen to be the murder of
killing peace. There was almost no harmony and silence then. Everyone was living with pounding hearts every
single day because no one could be sure of the deadline of wars. We never had the courage to think about
victory because it seemed to be an unreasonable expectation. Afterwards, the catastrophic disaster happened, as
Japan started invading our homeland. That was a nightmare to all of us. The inhumane ways of killing and
destroying our homes increased our anger and hate towards the Japanese. They killed, robbed and raped. These
kinds of things happened every day then. I wasn’t able to think about my future because I didn’t want to think
about how I might be killed. I didn’t want to die under the manipulation of the Japanese. To us, they were not
human but a group of demons. More and more people commit suicide then, as they didn’t want to face the
trauma anymore. I wrote my diary down as I hoped that one day I could read it again as I would still be alive. I
was a war correspondent, so I followed the troops to where the tragic scenes were repeated day after day. The
people beside me would be killed in the next moment. Yet, everyone was taught to face death, no matter how
old you were. I was wondering whether I would have a chance to stay alive, and this is where I am decades later.
The surrender of Japan was the greatest gift we could have had, as this was the only thing we could be granted
after uncountable numbers of casualties.
Afterwards, the serious civil war began. The Right and Left parties of China started to see each other as
enemies, as the same way we had seen the Japanese. People lost their minds and started to ask for more power.
The wars through the years “EDUCATED” and “BRAIN-WASHED” people to “FIGHT” whenever you wanted
to obtain power and success. Many of us seem to forget where we got our journey started and how hard we once
were, trying to fight for the harmony. Money, power and fame are now taking place over love, family and moral
values. What everyone wanted most, might not ever happen. That was unbearable to think about how our future
would turn to become. The days of horror did come back, and that was a hard time to see how our homeland
split into two pieces, and shattered. People were killed just because they protested the current active regime.
How ironic it was. The more we gained, the more we wanted. The original moral values were gone. The dynasty
of Tong, Song, Yuen, Ming, Tsing had granted the Chinese a massive sense of glory and pride. Yet, the heritage
left was being destroyed, simply because many people wanted to obtain fame. I once tried to end my life since I
didn’t know how to get used to the situation then. I couldn’t even recognize it anymore. The interior war lasted
ten years until Mao’s death. A year after 1976, the Cultural Revolution ended. Things then got back to the right
track. Life was much easier after decades of wars were stopped…” The old man is a bit breathless after the long
talk, he sighs and takes a deep breath. “You know what?! I quit being a correspondent afterwards, since it was
too hard to see how people destroy each other’s lives.”, the old man spoke as the sentiments seemed to float
over him. The young man seems interested in every word the old man says.
“
Thirty five years of my lifelong career, it’s pretty ironic that I give it up for something which I was
desperately pursuing for-the truest side of human-beings. No one is willing to see how far we have gone through.
From austerity to luxury, from harmony to conflict… Nothing will be as disheartening as things like this, I
meant seeing how people became self-centred”, the old man pauses, and slightly shakes his head. The young
man then says, “You should speak out and let this place hear your voice. They should have listened to the voices
of truth.” The two strangers found the bonding between each other. The old man gains the approval and
applause from a man who is 50 years younger than him. In the deepest side of their souls, arousing the attention
towards “Truth” and “Originality” is what they both asking for.
The man goes back to the publisher company he has been working for more than five years.
He knocks at the door of his boss’ office with a sense of joy on his face. When he gets in, he finds a seat and sits
down right away.
“
Still remember that I told you I want to write something about the past of China?!”, said the young man
eagerly. The boss nods and keeps focusing on a piece of story which is waiting to be published. He squeezes his
eyes as the smoke from the cigarette holding in his mouth flows to his eyes. It can tell from his expression that
he doesn’t have much interest in this kind of story.